My Best Friend

I lost my best friend on Saturday.  I have had her for 11 years and everyday without her feels empty.  I never expected to feel so alone, sad, hurt and even angry.  She was such a good girl, the best, in fact.  Unfortunately, she had cancer and I promised her and myself that I wouldn't let her suffer.  I don't think that I kept my promise as well as I should have.  I was selfish and didn't want to let her go.  I hope she knows how much I love her and that she was the best dog in the world!  I hope I gave her a good life and I hope she knows that I will be taken care of and that she did a great job of it while she was here.

Sometimes I think I hear you... your little grunts when you're trying to fall asleep.  Some mornings I wake up and forget that you're gone... it's heartbreaking when I realize that you're not here.  I haven't fed Bailey since you left, it's not because I don't want to, but I think John thinks it's better off if he does it for awhile. The first few times I watched and cried.  I wanted to feed you also.  That was always the routine... when you ate, she ate.  Coming home isn't easy either.  I would always come straight to you, especially in the end when I knew you couldn't come to me.  I miss you following me around the house.. even though the last month or so I wished you would have just stayed in your bed.  I told you every time that I would be right back and it wasn't worth trying to get up.  You never listened.  I will miss our car rides.  The other day when I got in my car and looked in the back seat I completely broke down.  There are still bits and pieces of your hair and I regret all the times I was upset about how messy you made my car.  I miss your soft lips and wet nose.  I miss our staring contests and your single bark at the back door letting me know you're ready to come in.  I will miss our walks through the orchard, that you loved so much and the way you would stop and wait for me when you were too far ahead.  I miss rolling over in the morning and seeing you next to the bed.  Even at the end when I spent so many days crying over what was to come, you were standing next to me at the side of the bed to make sure I was okay.  I've had a lot of break downs since you've been gone.  So many things remind me of you or of our last days together.  You were there for me through the best and worst times of my adult life and I will miss you everyday.  I love you so much Allie girl... xoxo

Happy Valentines Day 2012

Happy Valentines Day!  

We had a little picnic down by the river.  We love it there and so do the dogs.

I hope you enjoyed you V-Day as much as we did!

Out Sick.

Unfortunately, I have been pretty sick the last few days.  Pretty awful timing, if you ask me.  It's only my second week of school and I have already missed 3 classes.

It started Monday with a horrible cough and then Tuesday and Wednesday I had a temp of 102.  Yikes, I know!  I barely slept, which meant, Reynolds wasn't getting must sleep either.  Finally, Wednesday afternoon I got my temp to break to 99, Reynolds left work early and we decided to take an impromptu trip to Carmel.  We haven't been able to spend much time together, just him and I, and, sick or not, we really needed to get away!

The weather was nice and the dogs really enjoyed the beach.  I didn't have much energy and only had a couple bites of my dinner, but all in all it was a really nice and much needed trip!

On the downside, we were about 10 minutes away from our driveway and Reynolds' truck broke down.  So here we are sitting on the side of the freeway, in the pitch dark, with two antsy dogs in the back trying to figure out what to do.  Good thing he is a quick thinker and I, more than anything, appreciate his ability to stay calm and laugh things off.  

Within minutes his dad was there to take me and the dogs home while John waited for the tow truck.  It's pretty scary being on the side of the freeway at night with the loud cries of coyotes, and semi trucks flying by.  Especially when it came to transferring over my puppies from one truck to another.   

So, for the rest of the week and weekend I will be catching up on things around the house, papers, and reading.  Also, I'm missing my family, a lot, so they are also on the top of my list!

It looks like I need to start changing my diet and figuring out ways to stay healthy because, while working with kids, I have been getting sick more and more often.  

Any good tips out there?